The Best form of Protest

Finally, a form of protest I fully support. I don’t even care what it is these people are against, but I 100% believe that more people should follow their lead. Boring protests, such as crybaby students sitting idly by in a school to quietly have their voice heard, or gathering a large mass of people that make Sage Steele and other innocent bystanders late for work on a daily basis just so they can scream at nobody in particular about how unhappy they are- while simultaneously making everyone around them as unhappy to be in their presence- are wastes of time that do more harm than good. They think by being loud nuisances they’ll have their needs met simply because they demand it, because the world owes them handouts and they’ll stop at nothing short of putting forth actual labor and work to attain their wants and desires. This approach rarely works, and at the end of the day they retreat home, cardboard signs in hand, to recollect on their day of unpaid work of shouting in unison.

No more though! The true believers of a world they’ve created in their minds only are finally making a stand! Having enough with the state of our country, and truly believing that what they want is important because this is America and we think everyone deserves a participation trophy handed to them on a pillow as soft as the emotional state of millenials and hipsters, they’ve begun to actually make a positive difference. A week ago we saw what was hopefully the spark that fellow whiny protesters will follow. A man set himself on fire in front of the White House, dying later on from his injuries. Not to be outdone by him, a women in Florida stabbed herself 3 times, stating she could no longer live in Trumps country. I can’t wait to see how the next one follows up

This my friends is how we can begin to see a real change in the world we live in. If more people follow suit and begin to cause themselves bodily harm that results in their own death, then we can begin to thin out the herd. This world has needed a plague for some time, and finally this can be the cataclysm that sets us on the right course for the future. No more do we have to deal with nonsensical chanting and avoiding large mobs of people screaming about what’s hurting their feelings that day. We can make the world a smaller place where we don’t have to deal with so many idiots. The chances that those who waste their time with formal protests are also the ones who camp out in the left lane, take forever to order at the drive-thru, bring babies to the movie theater, think the Kardashians have talent, or always demand to speak to a manager are pretty high. They’re doing us all a favor by offing themselves in the name of change.

We can only hope that those who stand in the streets chanting they hate men, cops, Lebron James, black people and any other minority, Tom Brady, the final season of Game of Thrones, America and the troops, the way Sonic the Hedgehog looks in his movie, and any other issue they feel they need to rally against because it doesn’t fit in with the world they believe revolves around them will see the power in this move. It gives them total control. If you’re not willing to die for a cause then you really don’t believe in that cause. The whackadoo in Florida and the dumbass on the lawn of the White House believed what they’ve heard on MSNBC and read on Yahoo, and really don’t want to live in Trumps America. Because of their actions, they no longer have to.*

*The womens not dead, but judging her mental capacity, I don’t think we have to wait much longer

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